"Are you sure Lord? As I sat on the floor of my closet (aka my war room) I found myself questioning, begging, negotiating with what I was being told. "Lay it down? I can't!" I remember about a year prior, while at a company event literally saying, "thank you Lord for not asking me to lay this down." I suppose, maybe subconsciously I knew what was coming.....this was a journey. I definitely had frustrations about my work environment; lots of shaming, money focused not people focused, not 100% truthful. So why would I stay? Freedom. It was our sole income, hubby had retired from his 9-5, we had moved out of state and bought a home. So when I was asked to lay it down, the natural response was absolute devestation. You know what though? He met me in my dispare, my insecurity, my fear and was so faithful to speak to me whether it was through music, people, scripture and many other wonderous ways. When you pray. Be watchful and expectant. Scripture comes alive in the midst of despair. Joshua 1:9 has continued to speak to me over my journey.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your god will be with you whereever you go."
Joshua 1: 9
What's interesting is this verse transformed right along side of me. Everytime I read it a new truth jumps out at me. Some of the things that have struck me
"Have I not commanded you?" IT is a commandment take take courage and not be afraid!
"Be strong and courageous" Yes, we are made to conquor with God's help, to step boldly into our calling.
"DO NOT be terrified" Fear is a lie and will rob you of your God given destiny
"I am with you where ever you go" He will never leave or forsake you
So grateful for these truths.
When I embarked on the rebranding of Sincerely Ruby and the development of this blog, God gave me a clear word~ courage. I think it was two-fold, courage to continue walking out this journey and the topic of the launch series. I have to be honest, I didn't think that I would be discussing this portion of my journey just yet because I am still in it. There are days I still want to stay in my pjs, in bed and just not deal and more times than I can count that I have sobbed on the closet floor. But, here is what I know, Jesus will fill in the gaps. Stepping into your calling, going through the growth, sacrificing is never easy... It's painful, it's scary and it's absolutely freeing and beautiful all at the same time. Why beautiful? Because you discover your power, your gifts, God's divine call on your life. The road less traveled is often the one the unlocks your soul's purpose.